The road not taken

If you read this post I put up a few weeks ago, you would know that I’ve been sleeping on a decision.

At the end of last year, I enrolled to do a graduate program in coaching via distance learning.

I’m a certified coach, but since I had decided that 2026 is going to be a year of learning and growth, I thought this a good opportunity to upskill.

So when the institute where I was going to study at offered a slight rebate for early bird enrolments, I threw my name into the ring and signed myself up.

A few weeks ago, I finally logged into the course platform to look up the course materials and assignments.

Barely 2 minutes into perusing the materials, I found myself feeling frustrated.

The requirements felt – to me – rigid, restrictive, and even a wee bit silly.

Every deliverable that was expected had to be written a certain way, in a specific font, specific size, with so-and-so margins, and had to be a certain number of words. References had to be typed a certain way, in a certain format, …… and the list went on. The assignments were asking for what felt like, to me, painfully obvious; so obvious that I wondered why it was even a question.

And the strangest thing was that I couldn’t quite understand why I felt that way.

I have spent years in the academic field as a student as well as an instructor. I understand the need for clear structure and guidelines. Without them, the quantity (and quality) of submitted work can vary considerably because students do not know what is expected of them.

So it was weird for me to feel so agitated.

I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to begin the program, so I decided to set it aside for a few days.

In the meantime, I sat with these feelings and prayed about them. Why was I so emotional?

It was only after sitting with these feelings in the presence of the Spirit for almost a week that I finally came to the realization: the ‘school’ season in my life is over.

And I think this is where I need to share a confession with you from my heart; the main WHY I decided to sign up for the program.

Yes, I was looking to upskill. Yes, I wanted to learn.

But to be honest, I was also largely driven by a desire to go back to ‘school’.

I already have a degree – one that I have worked hard for and am proud of. But it isn’t in a subject matter that I am 100% passionate about.

During my college/university years, I was a bit of a coward and an opportunist. Motivated by anxiety and the need for security, I made certain choices purely because those doors of opportunity were open to me. My field of study is one of those: I decided to pursue that particular qualification because I was offered financial support.

Although I did well, deep down I felt like I had ‘missed out’ on something important.

And so, I thought doing this program would be a chance to do it over again.

But like the bible says, there truly is a time for everything and a season for every activity.

And the Spirit made it clear to me that the season for ‘school’ was over for me.

That although there are skills that I do want to grow in, this program was not going to help with them. It was going to teach me academic writing, when I want to nurture my content writing skills. It was going to teach me general coaching skills and tools, when I want is to do is learn specialized skills/tools.

I would be much better off doing a short, specialized courses instead.

It was difficult to come to terms with having to give up my ‘do over’.

I like school, so there was a little grief to know that ‘school’ was truly over and behind me. That it was time to forge ahead without looking back.

Until the Spirit reminded me of this poem by Robert Frost – one that I learned in school years ago:

The Road Not Taken

By Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

The road I chose has indeed made all the difference.

Good or bad difference, I do not know. In fact, I would never know. Because there’s no way for me to return to the fork in the road and go down the other path instead.

But one thing I do know: being an opportunist and doing a degree that I wasn’t passionate about has molded me into the person I am today.

Had I not completed that degree, I wouldn’t have completed my postgraduate degree, wouldn’t have met my husband, wouldn’t have the family I have today, and ultimately wouldn’t have the life I have today.

So perhaps the field of study wasn’t my passion. But I learned a lot all the same.

At the start of this week, I un-enrolled from the program.

And as I withdrew from the program, it struck me that this whole enrolling-and-unenrolling drama taught me another lesson: to have the courage to quit while I’m ahead when I KNOW something isn’t right for me.

So yes, I made a mistake.

But I think the mistake served its purpose, because it was the lesson itself.

I am now officially more educated now than I was before I enrolled.

So I guess going back to ‘school’ served its purpose after all!